This week the New York Times carried a story on rising rates of book theft.  In many stores, the theft rates have become so crazy that certain authors are kept behind the front desk.  (I have seen this setup, and I assumed that it was because some authors were considered too "adult" to be out on the floor.  Guess I was wrong there!)

The most commonly stolen books and authors are:

• The Bible (how ironic!)
• Martin Amis
• Charles Bukowski
• William S. Burroughs
• Raymond Carver
• Don DeLillo
• Jack Kerouac
• Mark Z. Danielewski's House of Leaves
• Jeffrey Eugenides The Virgin Suicides (according to a London newspaper, this is "the most shoplifted book of modern times."
• Paul Auster

Tangentially related, last week I watched and cringed as author Sherman Alexie willingly conflated "open source culture" with "piracy."  Alexie refuses to allow his books to be shipped as eBooks, because he insists that this is basically ringing a dinner bell for pirates.  Which, fair enough, he's allowed to have his opinion, and I know of several authors who opposed second hand book stores for the same reason.  

But there is a big difference between "piracy" and "open source culture."  Confusing the two is like comparing apples to scanning electron microscopy.    Books are the ultimate open source items, actually, because their source - the language, words, syntax, and structure - is visible to anyone who wants to see it.  If you want to, you can completely rearrange all of the words in your most recent Sherman Alexie book.  William S. Burroughs did exactly this, to great effect.

Furthermore, open source culture isn't "coming to get you."  And even if it did, allow me to point out the irony of Sherman Alexie - a proud keeper and proponent of contemporary Native American culture - dissing the gift culture of the open source movement.  Gift culture being, of course, one of the underpinnings of many Native American cultures.

However, Sherman Alexie's apparent confusion over all things internet-related does highlight the truth of the publishing industry: times are desperate.  Desperate times tend to push struggling people to the edge.  Where they say really crazy, ill-informed stuff, and talk out the wrong hole.  This, people, this is what you have driven Sherman Alexie to!  The man is so desperate to cling to his job (wouldn't you be?) that he goes on The Colbert Report and just rambles on about things that sound like facts but aren't.

Under these circumstances, how can someone feel right about stealing a book?  I'm not even going to address the issue of stealing bibles, I'm just going to write that off as the work of pseudo-Satanic teenagers.  I'm talking about The Virgin Suicides, a book which has been in print since 1993.  

If you (for whatever strange reason) prefer not to help support your favorite authors, then I would wager a solid greenback dollar that you can find a very affordable copy of The Virgin Suicides at a second-hand book store.  Or even - and this may sound radical and boring to William S. Burroughs fans who style themselves as "edgy" - at your local library.  For free.